Driving the Ambulance

(Look for me driving one of these-- ahh, scary!)

Yes, it is so. I am driving the ambulance. I am not driving the ambulance with lights and sirens yet, but it is fun to be able to speed all around town without a fear of getting pulled over. In fact, I was going 55mph in a 35mph zone in the ambulance the other day and as a cop passed by I just waved, and he waved back. Aww, how sweet.

Anyways, it is kindof nerve racking driving that gigantic thing around town. I am just thankful that I don't have to drive this monster on Six Forks Rd. Those lanes are extremely narrow.

Driving an ambulance is like driving a Ford F-350 with a box on the back instead of a bed that extends 1 foot more out on each side. I end up driving the thing really close to the line dividing the lanes so that I don't take out telephone poles alongside the road.

I thought I would be more nervous driving that thing around too, but once you get in there, you really enjoy it. Not to say that I'm not precautious, but it is fun.

There is one fear that I have. I fear wrecking the ambulance. My personal insurance could go up. I can only hope that if I ever get into an accident in an ambulance that it won't be my fault.

The hardest part about driving the ambulance is backing into the bays. It is stinkin' hard. Plus, they have put up these new concrete poles on each side of each bay so that people won't hit the building. It is hard fitting between those thingys. I am glad we have lines that run down the driveway so that I can sortof see my target. They just need to paint them better or lay down some reflectors.

My next goal will be getting good at driving the ambulance with a patient in the back and one of my partners working back there. I did drive some Explorers (a H.S. group that "explores" EMS life) back to the station last Sunday and didn't sling them around to bad, so I think I'm off to a good start.

On a side note, I came to a scene the other day where the police had tasered the guy (man, I so want to see someone get tasered) and he was a big guy. I was the only woman amongst 5 cops and 2 paramedics and I felt pretty nervous about getting anywhere near the guy. LOL. It was stinkin' awesome, though, to see the damage they inflicted on the door when they kicked it open!

Taxes

So, being in the "real world" has its perks and follies. One folly is that you end up paying more taxes. Probably because you made more money. Oh, so more money = more taxes = no more refund. No more refunds. Hmmm.... Probably because I haven't been paying taxes for the last year!

How did this happen you might say? I am not actually sure. But sure enough, as I looked at my W-2s and my most recent pay stub, they aren't taking anything out for the feds or the state. Yea horay... welcome the big tax bill. And guess what, yeah, I'm broke. I was saving for a house or furniture for when I got married, but now it all goes to the government. I say down with The Man!

Turbotax delivered the disheartening news a couple nights ago. I am dreading writing the $1176 check to the feds and the $548 to the state. Plus, now they want to avoid this problem in the future and want me to send an additional $294 quaterly until the next tax period. Grrrr.... Where is all this money going to come from?

I suppose it could be worse. I could owe a lot more. In fact, with being claimed as a dependant and without donations to church or charity, the bill would probably total $3000. But, i have convinced my Dad to not claim me and added in a lot of charitable monies, volunteer related expenses, and educational expenses and now I only owe the aforementioned dollar amount.

It still stinks.

I did, however, refile my W-4s so that they can start taking money out (since they haven't for the past 3 paychecks this year) so that I can avoid this problem next year.

It still stinks though.

The Stop Sign

Wouldn't you know it, the one time I would miss a stop sign, there would be a cop sitting right there to catch me.

I was on my way to tutor someone and as I cut my way through the back roads to get to the other side of Cary, there is this random, obscure stop sign. You wouldn't expect one there especially in my direction. As soon as I ran through it, I knew I had. I saw it as I drove through and thought to myself, "Ack! I missed the stop sign."

I looked back to make sure I hadn't cut someone off who was travelling in the other direction or caused an accident and as I came to the road I was going to turn on, I saw lights. At first I thought it was an emergency vehicle so I pulled to the right. However, it was a Cary cop, and yes, he was pulling me over.

He exited his car as I pulled out my license and rolled my window down. I said, "Good evening officer." Then he asked me if I had realized I just ran through a stop sign. I couldn't lie. I knew I had, so I told him that yeah, I had missed it.

He introduced himself and that was the turning point in this pull-over. I had run a call with him with the Cary Area EMS! I told him that as I handed over my registration. He asked me if I was about to get on duty. I told him no, and that the I was on again on Friday night. He then walked back to his car.

I panicked a little. I didn't want a ticket! Who does? I didn't mean to, I promise. He spent a few minutes in his car, I guess looking me up. I wondered if I wouldn't be allowed to drive the ambulance because of this mistake (I would have to tell my chief that I had a violation).

Then, the cop exited his vehicle, carrying only my license and registration. Whew! He then gives me a verbal warning, asks me to be careful next time, and ends it with, "I may need you someday."

Praise Jesus! I avoided a ticket because I am a volunteer EMT. That totally rocks.

I can guarantee you, though, that I will never run that stop sign again!

The ones I miss....

I was talking with Rodney yesterday on the way home from Winston Salem about how I miss a lot of my bestest friends (and family). Almost all of them live out of town and I miss them terribly. I have some in Boone, Asheville, Boston, and the Winston Salem area. These are for sure going to be my friends for life as well as some others.

Whenever I get to spend time with them, it always reminds me how much I care about them. From meeting in Greensboro to try on Bridesmaid Dresses to watching Wrestlemania on a big screen TV, the fun times make me happy to see them again. I just wish I had more time to visit everyone.

If I had it my way, we would all live in the same vicinity. I know it especially brings joy to Rodney and I when we see everyone again.

To all of you, and you know who you are: I love you dearly and miss you. Thanks for the calls, emails, and cards. You will always have a special place in my heart. To me, you are more than friends, you are family. I look forwards to being family to the end and beyond.

On my mind...

A topic that has been on my mind a lot since last year is being supportive and loyal to your friends. I try my hardest on most occasions. There are very few people whom I thought were friends, but for some reason or another tend to anger me to the point that I don't even want to hang out with them. I avoid being around them.

It gets hard when they are always pointing the finger at you and never at themselves. They don't approach you privately before embarrassing you in front of people whom you actually care about. Then, they make themselves unapproachable because for some reason or another they have this diluting power to control everyone else around them. They will stab your back the instance you piss them off and those people they have control over will for some reason believe them!

It's hard for me to even call them friends. I end up just dealing with it as best I can and treating them as Christianly as possible. I have to put up with them because they are fellow Christians. That really stinks sometimes.

To me, this sort of relationship is something I would end up getting out of. As soon as I can distance myself from a person like that the better.

It hurts a lot when someone you thought was your friend would all of a sudden not support you, point fingers, and go along with the opinions of the people they tend to control (who might have some power of control over them) just because they don't want to lose control. What kind of person is that anyways? To me, they are someone with their own agenda in everything. This worries me about future endeavors or relationships that they might be involved in.

The way I avoid getting my back stabbed is by not confiding in people that will take what you confide in them and gossip about it as soon as you do something to anger them. It could be as simple as disagreeing with them that could set them off.

It also hurts to see some of my real friends hurt by these "so called friends" through scheming and conniving plans to, for instance, break up certain or potential wonderful relationships and friendships.

I am not normally a confrontational person, especially when it is so hard to approach someone with the above, defined characteristics. My Dad always tells me that I just need to do it, and I really want to. I just feel it is futile and that someone who really means something in those people's lives will have to do it anyways for them to finally get the message.

Don't worry too much. If I have confided in you, you are probably not the people I am talking about. In fact, all of my close friends to this point (and you know who you are) have never made me feel like this. I know I have lasting relationships with many people and I love that we will grow old and still talk about gummy bears, canoe adventures, and "brown recluse" incidents. We will recall the time we had a email fight over a misunderstanding and then an email apology. We will remember ordering pizza at 1am and having it delivered to the zoology lab. We will remember the times we spent crying together over boys, our self-image, and death. We will remember sharing our crushes, getting our hearts broken, and learning to be better people because of it. We will remember hiking to Pilot Mountain, "smelling the flower," and weaning puppies. We will remember the countless times we went to concerts, recitals, youth rallies, sneaking into condemned, haunted houses, and going to camp or camping together. We will remember spending hours planning my wedding, sharing our thoughts, and just chilling out after a stressful time. We will be friends to the end.

It's just the other people, who call me their "friend" but aren't really behind my back, that I will avoid to make my emotional and spiritual life stronger.... without them making it harder for me.